Stirrings in the Wind
by Kyuuketsuki-san
Summary: Kagura's personal angst, caused by the swirling of confused feelings for a certain demon lord, battle against her refusal to accept that she might actually care for him. NOTE: Sesshoumaru's version is up.
1. Chapter 1

**Stirrings in the Wind**

**o**

**o**

I don't love you.

No matter how beautiful you are,

No matter how strong you are,

No matter how powerful you are…

o

**I don't love you. **

**I _don't._**

o

You can never own my heart.

How can you?

It is a heart that pounds in the inexistence,

A heart that will never be mine.

A heart that longs to beat for you, my angel.

o

But mere longing awakens not the life of something dead,

That is why I refuse to long for you,

A lord who offers nothing,

Only cold stares and cruel words.

Yet what can _I_ offer?

Nothing.

o

**And definitely not love.**

o

I shouldn't love you.

I am born of evil,

An incarnation of darkness and of sin.

I do not wish to taint you, to stain your celestial presence

With the vileness from whence I came.

o

I should curse your perfection,

Instead, I bless it.

For it is my salvation.

No matter how unworthy,

Or impure I am for you.

o

All I want is to burn in the fire of your gaze,

In the feel of your hands,

Moving across me,

To hear your voice,

Your voice, like whispers in the wind,

Your lips,

Your beautiful lips…

o

**But I shouldn't think this. **

**I shouldn't!**

o

Still…I _want_ to love you.

With every fibre of my being.

But should evil love? Can evil love?

Can evil _be_ loved?

o

I want to belong,

To belong to someone other than he

Who fills my already polluted soul

With hatred.

o

I want to belong to you, my prince.

But can it be?

How? How can it ever be?

If it is impossible for the sun

To meet with the moon in the sky,

If fire can never be one with water,

How can I ever be with my lord?

o

**I can't.**

**But I want to.**

o

I want to touch that moon kissed forehead,

A mark I forever remember when I gaze

At the glowing crescent in the heavens.

I want to be with you,

I want to hold you.

Please let me hold you.

o

**Please…**

o

Let me love you.

Before my temporary existence

Is snatched from me

Before I close my eyes,

Against the wind forever.

I wish to feel you.

o

Let your eyes roam free upon me,

Those cool, secret holding eyes,

That seek out truths,

Yet hide your own.

o

Let me experience the warmth

Of your strong arms around me,

Protecting me, loving me.

Before I join the breeze

That plays so lovingly

With your moonlit hair.

o

**It's impossible.**

**I _can't._**

o

But only from a distance do I dream

A distance made greater

By every call of a dark master

With every beckoning of my vile punisher.

My freedom is a mere illusion.

And no one can help me

Not even you, my powerful lord.

o

I cannot reach you,

I cannot touch you,

Yet this matters not

Because I don't love you.

I cannot love you.

I mustn't.

I _shouldn't_.

o

**But I do.**

**And I always will.**

…**Sesshoumaru.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Stirrings in the Wind**

**II**

You claim you don't love me.

You tell me with your own words,

Vulgar and imperfect words.

You deny it. You always deny it.

O

But I know. I _know_.

I can see it in your eyes,

Ruby red eyes that observe in the quiet,

Following me and haunting me.

O

You think you can fool this lord?

You believe you can watch me,

On the breeze, in the wind,

And not be discovered?

O

How wrong you are, sorceress.

How very wrong you are.

You forget my power,

You forget my position,

You forget it all.

O

**It would be best to forget.**

O

Forget me, wind witch.

Unwind your thoughts

From any illusion you have of me.

Release this false hope,

For I will never return

Whatever you may offer me.

O

Yet how can you offer anything?

Your body possesses a void.

It is incomplete, flawed,

Lacking in an organ that,

I know not how to decipher.

O

You lack a heart,

An essence, a being.

Do you believe,

That my influence

In your personal battle,

Will return to you what you never had?

O

**Foolishness…**

O

It is all foolishness.

Just as what you do to me is foolish.

Yes witch,

Are you not aware

That you stir this lord's very soul?

O

But I will not surrender,

I will not submit

To your subtle, hidden influence.

This lord will _not_ fall.

O

I must erase your existence,

Your image,

From my mind.

Before it grasps at my reality,

And worms its way past my control.

O

Do you not realise

You taunt me with your ways?

Do you fail to see

That you hypnotise me

With your dance?

O

This lord asks,

That you look not into my eyes,

Witch, you cast a spell on me.

The breeze in which you thrive,

Caresses my senses

And clouds my conscience.

O

How I desire to ensnare you,

In my embrace,

To feel those lips,

To taste that skin,

To make you mine…

O

**Impossible…I cannot.**

O

And you say you don't love me.

But Kagura, I know you're lying.

Yet if I were to say,

That I felt nothing for you,

I'd be accused of lying too.

O

**And this Sesshoumaru does _not_ lie.**


End file.
